Damn Near Mexico
So, late Friday afternoon I head to the mall for some day game practice. When I get there, I decide shit, it’s Friday, I might as well texts a few of my boys and see what’s going on tonight.
So, I send out the mass text…..
A few minutes later, my boy Nickle calls me, “what’s going on tonight?”
“Shit, I don’t know. That’s what I was texting you to find out…”
“I’m bout to go take care of some business in [city far as fuck away on the Mexican/US border]. Come help me drive and I’ll pay you.”
“Alright, I’m in.” Shit, I didn’t have nothing else to do.
“I’m about to leave in like 30 minutes. I’ll come pick you up.”
Welp, fuck this mall approaching shit. Time for a weekend business trip. I head back to the crib and pack my bags.
He comes, picks me up and we head out.
We stop and pick up another dude, I’ll call him Levi.
We head out. The city we’re driving to is like fucking 12 hours away. We all take turns driving. I get the late night shift – from 12:30 AM to 7:30 AM, and I’m pretty sure I killed a rabbit at some point. Hey, if he wanted to live he shouldn’t have ran out onto the interstate in front of an SUV going 90 mph… wasn’t much I could do about it…
We get there early on Saturday morning, head straight to the hotel, eat the free continental breakfast and crash…..
Wake up about noon and take care of business. Then, we hit a local bar to watch some college football and get drunk. I’m drinking Kettle One straight, so I get pretty lit. We ask our waiter where some good places to go out tonight are (Saturday night). He doesn’t really know, but goes and gets a waitress for us and she tells us a whole bunch of spots.
Then, we stumble on over to the mall. Nickle is trying to buy some shit on sale, but Levi and I are looking for chicks to fuck with. As soon as we walk in, I say something to Levi like “man, I swear this isn’t America. We’re definitely in Mexico, bro… what city is this?”
Not missing a beat, he walks up to the chick that’s directly to our left… “Hey, do you know what city we’re in right now? Yeah, what city is this?”
Nickle and I try not to laugh as we walk off and let our boy do his thing. I think he got the number. Not sure though.
I’m still drunk as shit from happy hour, so rather than day game like I normally do, I’m just being stupid. Yelling shit at girls, “Hey, what the fuck does your shirt say?”
You ever seen a drunk person in a mall? Yeah… most chicks just ignore me. Levi and Nickle laugh their asses off though.
We get back to the hotel and it’s already getting to be about that time to go out, but we’re all tired so we crash and nap for a bit.
We wake up and start to get ready to head out. I’m sober now – slept it off. The topic of conversation leads to chicks, to which Levi inquires, “Have you ever smashed a chick you met downtown in [the city I just moved from]?”
“That’s what’s up. I haven’t done that yet. It’s on my list of things to do.”
“Yeah, I did it twice last month actually…” I’m not really trying to brag, I’m just being honest…. lol.
“Damn. You must be having a hell of a year, huh?”
“Ehh…. it’s alright.”
“And you gave all of that up to move back home?”
I shrug my shoulders.
We hit the downtown scene. Park the car and look over the barbed wire fence that separates the US from Mexico and then head out to the bars/clubs.
We go to the one club everybody kept telling us about, but it seems to be dead, so we just walk around some more. Nickle approaches some chick on the street who’s by herself and we let him do his thing and head into a nearby club. We didn’t really know where to go, so we just go to the place with the longest line… it’s got to be popping right?
The bouncers are actually holding the line to make it longer just for this reason. We know that, but we go anyway.
I’m still a little tired, so as soon as we get inside I head straight to the bar and buy a vodka and red bull.
Nickle eventually comes in and catches up with us. I don’t know why he didn’t leave with that chick, she was definitely trying to fuck somebody…
Anyway. I get my drink and try to do a couple of approaches. Get blown out quick a couple of times and then I go up to Levi, “Let’s play a game bro, I’ll point out some chicks and you approach them, then you point some out and I’ll try.”
Two chicks walk by, I look at Levi, “Go get them bro.”
He goes after them. He’s talking to them for a little bit, but then he comes back over complaining, “you can’t be choosing moving targets like that man, gotta pick some girls that are in one spot.”
“Alright man. Well point some out for me.”
He points to a couple of chicks nearby. I approach, talk to them a bit, but it goes nowhere.
“Fuck this standing by the bar shit, let’s move around the club.” I tell Levi.
So, we head around the club. I see a real cute latina wearing glasses and walk past her a bit and approach from over my shoulder. She opens and I turn to her. She seems interested and keeps leaning in to me to talk to me. She’s with her friend, but her friend is shorter, more portly and really just not very attractive.
Levi was standing there initially, but he leaves soon after. I guess he wasn’t trying to hold the other chick down for me, which basically leaves me trying to entertain both chicks.
I’m mainly talking to my target, but I engage her portly friend too. The portly friend is smoking a cigarette. I don’t even smoke but I take it off of her and take a couple of hits. I don’t know why I do this, just cuz really….
I’m talking to my target, who’s 26 and was born in Mexico, but now lives in the US because it’s “safe”. She seems cool and we talk for a little bit, but the conversation never really goes anywhere. Like it kind of just stalls out. She asks me silly shit like what side of town I live on in my hometown…. umm, you care, why? You’ve never even been there….
For some reason I stall out. I can’t think what I want to do with this chick, I still have an hour before last call and I’m running out of shit to talk about. She’s not necessarily carrying the conversation much either and the possibility of isolating her away from portly friend seems a bit difficult since they’re just the two set.
So, after talking to her for about 15 minutes, I just shake their hands and tell them it was nice meeting them and walk away.
I walk back toward Nickle and Levi. Some short chick is dancing nearby, so Levi pushes me into her, “That’s all you!”
I grab her waist and dance with her. She grinds on me and then smiles at me and pushes my chest very softly. Then she tries to get close to me and get all up on me. I push her the fuck off of me. She looks suprised, but smiles and comes back to me and we dance some more.
Then, eventually she runs up to some dudes she knows and hugs him and we head out.
We leave the club, and Levi is laughing his ass off…. “My boy Willy Wonka! You crack me up, bro! She pushed my boy a little bit, and he pushed her back harder!! She looked up at him like, ‘damn, did I do something wrong?’ That shit was hilarious!”